In this post I will just give an update on Caleb and I’s relationship. We have been in the same living quarters for a little over 2 months now. It seems like it has been way longer than that but also it seems like it hasn’t. If you are just now discovering our journey here I will give you a quick summary of our relationship . . .

Caleb and I have been together a year and a half or maybe a little longer than that. We did long distance for the majority of our relationship then got engaged November of last year. After that we decided that once we got married we would put down some roots in Indiana (where he is from) so I decided to move to Indiana and live with him and his family.

Now it has been two ish months and to be honest it has been a little bumpy. We are both creatures of habit and love routine. When I moved here I had to learn to adjust to his family while also creating my own routine. His family has been amazing and patient with me as I learn how everyone’s schedule works and how I will fit into all of that. I got a job and then less than a month later got another job and then a week or so later I started school. My schedule kept changing and I was having a hard time adjusting let alone find time for Caleb and I’s relationship so our communication suffered and our intentional time was almost nonexistent which made the process even harder for me because I felt alone and didn’t know how to communicate to Caleb what I needed because I didn’t have time to figure that out for myself.

Then family came into town and I was not prepared, I was so busy trying to adjust, and time just got away from me and suddenly they were here. Caleb was such a champ in helping me figure out how I was going to move my schedule around so I had more time with them. Of course it was not perfect (will share my family’s visit in next blog) But God knew what He was doing and we all had such a good time. It was very exhausting but I was able to see Caleb in a new light. He was so patient with me and encouraging and helped me in so many ways, he was there with my family when I had to work, he helped me with work and hanging out with my family. God revealed some things to me about him that I had not seen in a while and it was exciting and I felt very close to him. We may not have had time to spend a lot of intentional time just the two of us but I feel very close to him and enjoyed seeing him with my family.

I think it took all the chaos for God to show me that He is still working in our relationship, that we are not perfect but we are making it work. God is preparing us for marriage right now, I have been so worried that we won’t ever have time for us but when it really counts I know that Caleb would drop everything to help me, he will go above and beyond to make sure I felt safe and felt good about myself. I would not be able to juggle all this work and school without him. I mean I probably could but God put Caleb in my life so I would not have to do it all alone.

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.

Ephesians 4:2

As we are both going through a season of adjusting and growing together it is important that we focus on being gentle and patient because as brothers and sisters of Christ we should treat each other as such. The more we are patient with each other the easier it will be for us to communicate what we need from the other person. We also have to realize that we are both transitioning and we show that differently, so we should be gentle and understanding that we need time to figure things out. The last thing is to be humble in the fact that we are both uncomfortable in a way. This is new for both of us and we have to relearn each other, learn our habits, learn our boundaries, and really just learn how to live life together and that just takes time.

During our time with my family we were more willing to show each other gentleness, patience, and also be humbled by the other person because we were out of our normal routine and we both had to go with the flow (which is something I have a hard time doing). Caleb was a champion on this trip and I was able to rely on him and that was very humbling because I do not have to do things on my own in fact God calls us to do things together. “Bear with one another in love” we are to go through things together and “bear” it together. That was the missing component I feel like, we were both trying to do things alone.